Adoption Support

I had a great conversation with a very dear friend of mine today - I always leave her with a giggle and a lighter outlook on life. Today, she was there for me when I didn't even realize how much I needed it. You know who you are and I thank you so much for your encouragement, support, concern and friendship. Those friends are few and far between.

Adoption is a gift, but it is one you work for, you shed many tears for while you wait, your heart longs and yerns for a baby, and you wait some more. If only it were as easy as getting in line, placing your order and walking away with a wonderful little miracle. There are encouraging days, days of tears, days of anger, days full of hopelessness, days filled with numbness and days when you just can't imagine getting out of bed and starting all over again not knowing. I encourage each of you to be an encouragement to your friends and loved ones going through an adoption. We all need a smiling warm face to help us make it through. If you see a tear in our eye, don't avoid us, give us a hug. If we sound a little down when you talk to us, make us get out of the house or away from the job and enjoy a girl's day out. Some days we want or need to wallow and want to be left alone, but some days we want to know that someone out there cares about us and what we are going through. We are hopeful and are excited about the experience of adoption, but it is a trying time and it takes lots of love and support to make it through until we get that sweet baby in our arms.

I found this poem today from someone going through an adoption in Vietnam and I thought it very well said.

Even though I was afraid you laid a hand on mine

and said "it's ok, don't cry Myla, ...

your baby is out there and she's waiting patiently for you."

Even though I didn't believe some days, you believed for me,

when I couldn't muster it,

you called, you wrote, you came around anyway.

When I couldn't stand anymore questions or talk

you said you were thinking of me and

that meant so much even if I couldn't express it

I was angry and hurting, so much grief, pain, and loss,

when I could not see beyond it you said "love, Myla"

When I was too close to the situation and my vision clouded,

bogged down in logistics, you reminded me of the reason, l

ove of the direction, faith of the necessity,

trust of the power inherent in us all to rise above.

My tears are grateful ones now, friend,

believe it. I take you with me when I go.

Copyright Myla Stauber 2000